Trailer - “Tennyson Signs On”

With V.P.I. shut down by the authorities pending investigation, the gentlemen detectives are unemployed. And so Niall Tennyson must sign onto the dole for the first time. All he needs is a little help from those dole scrounging dicks Vultour and McGrain.

The Janine Drew Agency

There's another new detective agency in town. Janine Drew isn't waiting around to work for V.P.I. or the Pinkertons. She's set up her own agency and she's named it after herself. That's right, The Janine Drew Agency. And she ain't taking shit from no one. Business just picked up. www.JanineDrewAgency.com

“Attack Of The Pinkertons”

Unemployed and underground (well, in Tennyson’s house), Vultour and McGrain are intent on eluding the clutches of their old friend Natalie Blaise. Tennyson however is looking for a peaceable resolution, no doubt with a strong mug of scald and a chat involved. However, Natalie Blaise doesn’t seem to be open to dialogue. The Pinkertons are making their presence felt. And people are getting hurt. Can V.P.I. regroup and fight back? Will Natalie Blaise emerge from the shadows to explain herself in a long winded villainous fashion? Or is she merely just misunderstood? And what will Tennyson do to fill in the unemployed hours?

Introducing.....

Natalie Blaise (Ita Morrissey/Hazel Doyle)

Natalie Blaise was a young tomboy when she first moved to Ireland with her family in 1997. Goofy, smart and almost hyperactively enthusiastic, she soon made friends with the awkward, introverted and spotty 17 year old Dan McGrain and Jim Vultour. Dan and Jim didn’t know much about girls or why girls would even talk to them but Natalie was very friendly and showed an interest in the deductive arts. And so they became a detective unit that they called The Terrific Three. They prided themselves on solving mysteries like jumble sale robberies and finding stolen bikes and once they cracked a crack smuggling ring. For a while, Jim’s little sister Isabelle tagged along with them but Natalie persuaded the boys not to bring Isabelle because Natalie felt she ‘slowed us the fuck down.’ Instead, with her after school detective earnings, Natalie bought a West Highland Terrier which she named Marlowe, after Raymond Chandler’s famous detective. Jim and Dan hated the ‘bastard hound’ and soon the cracks in their friendship began to show. Soon Natalie seemed to dress more lady like, wearing make up and heels. She started to look… professional. Becoming aware of her seductive powers, Natalie soon began to date both young dicks simultaneously. A fight between them ensued and Natalie instead went to her Debs with Kieran Bergerac, a dubious rugby jock. Realising they had been chewed up and spat out, the vengeful spotty boys plotted horrid revenge against their first girlfriend. And did they feel guilty? Well why would they? The Natalie they had eaten tongue sandwiches and drank ginger ale with was dead. What was left was a rage filled creature of ambition and ruthless cunning. Yes…. Aged 18, Natalie Blaise had become a monster.

Training in criminal law, Natalie was recruited by Interpol as their Irish liaison officer. She would go on to be one of the greatest young detectives in the world. She is glamorous, ruthless, speaks 6 languages and gifted with skills in martial arts and cooking,

Not much else is known of Natalie’s burgeoning adult detective career but her work with Interpol took her worldwide leading her to working in harsh foreign locales like Baghdad, Kosovo, Colombia and of course, Limerick. Rumours have sprang up about assassinations, major corruption and membership of crimelord Johnny Curragh’s rogue female detective coterie known only as ‘Johnny’s Blades’. In her home town, she came something of a myth, a spook story. Vultour and McGrain only referred to her as… the woman. Natalie Blaise is back. And she wants to destroy everyone.

Facts:

1. -Name: Natalie Margaret Elsa Blaise
   

2. -Date of Birth: 11 July 1981
   

3. -Place of Birth: Melbourne, Australia.
   

4. -Parents: Colin Blaise (A chef), Betty Blaise (Also a chef)
   

5. -Siblings: Damian Blaise (34, a computer programmer), Scott Blaise (29, a rugby player), Jeff Blaise (21, a puppeteer), Rory Blaise (19, a student)
   

6. -Pets: A West Highland Terrier, Marlowe. (R.I.P.)
   

7. -Known Aliases: Matahari De Winter, Wendy Kroy, Delilah Macbeth.
   

8. -Profession: Director of Operations, Pinkertons Ireland / Private Investigator / Spy.
   

9. -Marital Status: Single. No long term relationships are known of. Apparently is ‘very demanding and highly unreasonable’. Information gleaned from a first date victim.
   

Quote:

“G’day”

Cast & Crew

Hamish Lane (Ken McGuire)

This scroungy, scuzzy and scabby Scotsman is the latest advance in street informant technology. Hailing from the mean streets of Glasgow, Hamish Lane uses his wheelchair bound state to lull people into a false sense of security and when they spill valuable info, the seemingly down and out Scotsman hoovers it all up and spits it back out for a price. This is one of many advantages he has over the far more suspicious looking Jack Street. Which made it all the easier for Hamish to push his arch enemy off his turf.

Hamish used to sit outside the local shopping centre with his little Chihuahua, singing old Scottish folk songs (‘Two Little Boys’ being his favourite) and getting change off people. But little did passers by know that this scuzzy punk is actually one of the biggest crime bosses in town, trading information, sabotaging the Russians and selling illegal fireworks (and oftentimes heroin). Hamish Lane is taking over every patch of turf in town, and the only thing that’s going to stop him is his wheelchair getting clamped

Facts:

1. -As of yet, has not got his wheelchair clamped.
   

2. -Enmity with Jack Street started when they used to share a squat and Jack Street never replaced a can of Bachelor’s Beans which he ‘borrowed’ from Hamish.
   

3. -In retaliation, Hamish had his ‘crew’ kidnap Jack Street’s cat and cut her leg off. Hamish mailed the cat’s leg to Jack in a Scots Clan tin.
   

4. -Hamish Lane has been known to drink Irn Bru and eat Maynard’s wine gums. However, he does think haggis is ‘fuckin’ rank sheep shite’.
   

5. -Before Hamish became wheelchair bound, he used to sleep in a trolley. However, most trolleys are not wheelchair accessible nowadays.
   

Quote:

“Alright soldier, got any change?”